Senseful ramblings of an incoherent nature from a delusional schizophrenic (or my views on current events)

Tuesday, March 15, 2005

Halcyon

The news was unnerving at best. I knew it was going to happen sooner or later, although I was hoping for later. And even though I expected it, it still came out of the blue and hit me like a ton of bricks. I guess I just didnt expect the well of emotions that came over me to be so cumbersome, but they were.

I remember the times we had together, good and bad, and always will. I remember the last time we spoke and the things we said to each other before saying goodbye that last time, almost like it was yesterday. Maybe it was yesterday, when things were different.

Im told that life goes on though, that we get on living as we get on dying, and that is true, but the dimensions are now different and I wont be able to see as I used to. Perhaps that is a good thing though. Perhaps.

As much as I try, I dont understand the simplicity that we call life, but we are all married to it, or at least engaged. I cant comprehend how a person can be there one day and just not the next. We have a limitless mental capacity, yet we are bound by our physicalities.

I suspect that the shock will eventually wear off and that my energy now exuded towards shaking will once again go towards making the clock tick. The conundrum, however, is when this serenity shall return.

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