I speak deaf?!? (MLlaah, MLlaah)

Yesterday, while at work, I was part of a party of three who was responsible for throwing a celebration in honor of a circulator bus that runs in one of the municipalities in our service area. This bus, because of its declining ridership, was almost canceled by the municipality's council, however, it was saved due to the many seniors in the area that complained. This party was meant to be a thank you to all those folks, including the council, who saved the bus.

Most of the people that showed up were old, some even ancient. Many had horrible maladies, like one guy who was covered with bulbous bumps all over his face, head and neck (and probably the rest of his body). I called him Mr. Leper. There was also Ms. Saggy Face, who I make fun of because the right side of her face was slowly oozing off as if it was made of silly putty. I wanted to go up to her with the funny pages to see if I could make a copy, but after realizing that her ailment was probably caused by a stroke I backed off.

Every single one of these old folks brought a bag with them to take leftovers home with them because, as I was told by just about all of them, multiple times, old people either dont like cooking anymore, or cant. Sad fact really.

The saddest part of the celebration, at least in my eyes, was that there was only one guy with a cane, so I was unable to fulfill my lust for getting photos of old people with canes (Old Men With Canes).

After feeding the masses, handing out some certificates to the board in recognition of the saving of the bus, watching the vultures come back for seconds, thirds and take homes, and cleaning up our story begins in earnest.

When I was about to leave two younger (younger relative to the old folks who were taking all the food) ladies came in. At first they were noticeably quiet. Then I heard one blurt our, "MLlaah, MLlaah." (The sound "MLlaah" is made by saying blaah, but replacing the "b" with an over emphasized "ML." To get the look of "MLlaah" correct you will have flop your tongue out of your mouth after making the "l" sound of the second "l") I laughed at first, to myself, because I thought she was fooling around with her friend, until I actually got a good look at the two of them.

One was wearing all black, from head to toe - coat, shirt, pants, hair color, skin color, etc. - and was about 40ish. She didnt speak at all. The other, the MLlaah, MLlaah lady, was wearing pink sweat pants, a black coat with a green scarf and a green hat with black shoes. While she was making her "MLlaah's" she was also speaking with her hands. Ah, these ladies are deaf. So no making fun of them.

They perhaps came for the party, but more than likely saw that there was free food, which was fine with us. Miraculously there were some left-overs, albeit slim pickings.

The one lady dressed in all black kept to herself and looked through the food until she found something she liked. The MLlaah lady came over to me and went, "MLlaah, MLlaah, MLlaah," while using sign language. My response? "Im sorry, we are out of plates, you could use these napkins."

A few minutes later, "MLlaah, MLlaah, MLlaah."

"Yes, there are forks at the end of the table, right next to the soda."

Finally, as I was about to leave, she came up to me again, using sign language and saying, "MLlaah, MLlaah, MLlaah."

"Hmm, I dont have any bags, but I can go look in the kitchen." I scour the kitchen for a bag and hold it open for her as she dumps her soda, a few pieces of hoagie, and chips in the bag.

"MLlaah!"

"Oh, your welcome, have a good day."

This experience leads me to one conclusion. I can communicate with deaf people! Now I am not sure if I am predisposed to understand sign language, especially since I have never learned, or if I am just able to understand the MLlaah dialect that some deaf folks speak, or even if I am just connected through esp to this one specific deaf person, but I do know I was able to communicate, and isnt that special of me?

Yes, heap praise on me people, I speak deaf! MLlaah lady was even very happy with me and my ability to "speak" with her and help her. As I drove off away from the party she was outside on the corner waiting for her friend, the lady in black. She saw me and began waiving profusely with a huge grin on her face and her bag of food in her other hand. I could read her lips saying what else but, "MLlaah." I waved back and drove off, happy at my new found ability.

Chicken Politics

Politics is a game that everybody is invited to play, but not nearly 25% of us actually participate. This allows the people like George Bush to get elected and play their games with our tax dollars, and what do we do about it? Still not step up to the plate. This trend is highly disconcerting.

Bush's proposed budget - and this is me using my new favorite word - is redonkuless. The budget calls for $2.77 TRILLION in spending. Treasury Secretary John Snow claims, "This budget represents the president's dedication to fiscal discipline, an efficient federal government and the continuation of a thriving U.S. economy."

This statement is clearly the truth as Bush as our government is in over its head with a record deficit of $423 Billion. This dedication to fiscal discipline includes the cutting of the budgets of 141 government programs, nearly 1/3 of which are educational programs, including support for educational arts, parent resource centers and drug free school zones. He is also cutting funding to Medicare, I suppose so that old people will die younger, which will then off-set the sky-rocketing costs of social security (an issue that has, I guess, been tabled since last year's state of the union address). As if it isnt already hard enough for an elderly or disabled person to gain health support, Bush's budget calls for nearly $36 Billion in cuts over the next five years. There are some Republicans, including Arlen Spector, who call these reductions (Bush refuses to call them cuts) scandalous.

If you’re like me, you may wonder why, with all of these cuts, the budget is calling for increased spending. Im sure I dont have to tell you the reason, you've probably already guessed it.... Yep, another increase in military spending, to the tune of nearly 7%. The budget calls for $439.6 Billion in military spending. And as ridiculous as this next statement sounds, it is the truth: that number doesnt even include the cost of two wars that we are currently involved in - a number that approaches $130 Billion.

Additionally, the White House continues to bribe our better judgment by offering the continuation, on a permanent basis. Basically, they are admitting that they dont need as much money per person that they used to need. But what they realize and we, the average US citizen, dont is that there are more of us than ever, allowing them to continue to play their world-wide game of battleship with the highest level of funding ever. Yikes!

And because of this tax cut, and this increased spending on the military and two congruent wars, our future is looking quite grim. The programs that are suffering the most are those that help the impoverished to attain a respectable education, or help the elderly live out a pain-free existence. Yet somehow the Republicans are able to get these people, those most affected by the cuts, to continue to not only support them, but also to come out in droves to vote for them. Some of the poorest states in our union are in the midwest, and all of these states somehow turn red on Election Day.

Clearly a change needs to be made, however cutting the head off of this chicken is not a viable option. His head is firmly planted until November of 2008. However, this year we can opt to change the feet that support this chicken. We can change the Republican controlled congress. We can vote for those who will offer stability among our government so that maybe the chicken will start walking straight instead of making all those uninhibited right turns.

Please, instead of bitching about all of the problems, go out and vote (for WHOEVER you want, regardless of my opinion) and make a difference.